Yawn. Yea I know. Stop before I make you yawn. I have always been curious about what causes one to yawn when they are tired.

I think of such silly things here at 1 something AM. I will have to admit that I would prefer it that way. Sometimes, I wish I could only think of silly things. Tonight is one of them.

I am pondering those eternal things tonight. Those deep perplexing things. You know the ones. Paper or plastic? Neither. Canvas.

Oh would that was true. I am wondering about end of life things. You know how when a body is failing and shutting down and for some reason the dying has a good day or good week. There you are: finally at terms with the inevitable and then a few days of better health and appetite. Do you dare to hope? Do you believe in miracles? Karma?

Why does any loving being design a body that ends its life like this. Why not a design that allows for a simple end? I am not wishing for an escape from disease or self-inflicted harm but why not have a sub-routine written in that allows the end to be more certain once it begins.

No 3-6 months. No remission that lasts for a brief time. When the end begins there should be a finite time. A time to settle your debts, set up the future for your loved ones, tell them that you love them and then accept that it is time to move on.

Why have people setting awake at night wondering if a person will make it through the night? Why turn a family on end for six months?

I see why people embrace assisted-suicide and euthanasia. There is a sense of control and empowerment to it. “I am deciding when and where.” Not that I agree with suicide as a solution to failed love, job loss or simple depression. But when all hope is expended, all remedies have failed and all that is left is pain and loss of the dignity due to loss of control of bowels and bladder. Why not?